Dear parents and friends, it is a pleasure to have you listening to our psychologist, Ms. Lee Li Li’s public sharing on the topic “Teenage Rebellion and Their Challenging Thoughts”, on 23rd July 2019, Tuesday, 10:00am, on Ai FM 89.3/106.7 Ai Ceria session.

“Rebellion” is not a negative noun, it is merely our negative stereotype and our attitude towards it. As a matter of fact, teenage rebellion is a part of necessary development into adulthood. Rebellion can be a positive thing, as it entails the development of self-identity and self-awareness.

Our response to teenagers need more attention in the teenage rebellious stage.

Parents could do some preparatory work before teenager grows into the rebellious stage. Firstly, the mental attitude towards the rebellious stage needs to be adjusted. If parents lack positivity in the child’s growth towards the rebellious stage, then the establishment of communication between parents and children will become in vain. Secondly, decentralization. This does not meant giving full authorization to the child in making decision, but to provide a platform for them to develop independent decision-making skills.

So, when and how should parents decentralize?

1. Autonomy

2. Freedom of expression

3. Privacy

In terms of autonomy, parents may communicate with their teenage child as an equal to them, as it provides a space for parents to guide their teenager to practice independent decision-making skills. For example, the decision to spend time on school revision or recreational activities with friends. Instead of using the top-down approach, if parents put themselves in their teenager’s shoes and interact, their teenage child will gradually understand the care of their parents, and become more willing to have an open and effective communication.

Trust is build between parents and child when they are able to speak from their heart. If parents have the thought of taking full control of their child’s entire life, the relationship between parents and child will become rigid. In turn, the child will become more secretive as a result to escape parental control. We all fear of the unknown, but if we have a resentful attitude towards them, teenagers will go towards their peers for affirmation or to confess. Parents should respect their child’s privacy, express their care in appropriate situation. However, parents should not be permissive towards teenagers’ decision. The reason being, there are topics that seems to be awkward to teenagers, such as the topic on sex education. Hence, for such topics, parents ought to take initiative to discuss about it. Although teenagers generally have the curiosity towards sexual topics, they do not explicit it. Therefore, parents could take initiative to start such topic through movies, books, or public sharing, to create a platform to spark a discussion and to help teenagers to enhance their self-awareness and also their perception of life during the rebellious stage.

Please click this link to find out more, and to watch the full sharing on communicating truly with your teens: Youtube

Note: The above content is adopted from Ai FM 89.3/106.7 (Ai Ceria) programme - “Teenage Rebellion and Their Challenging Thoughts” on 23rd July 2019.

For more information, please kindly contact our office. It is our pleasure to assist you. Thank you.